Gooberzilla's Greatest Blog EVER!

FEAR THE GOOBERZILLA! Home of the Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast. And the Worst Movie EVER! Podcast, too. A blog devoted to reviewing only the finest films ever made. And robots. Lots of robots. Robot alligators from Jupiter, bent on enslaving the human race and forcing us to service their fiendish, cybernetic dentures, since they themselves have lost this wondrous technology... Also, various and sundry shenanigans.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Hot Chix with Swordz


In flagrant defiance of all evidence to the contrary, Ultraviolet is the Greatest Movie EVER.


4 Minutes, 37 Seconds In:

Nick Chinlund as Daxus. I love this guy.

8 Minutes, 22 Seconds In:

Cameron Bright as Six. Not quite so loveable.

CLOSING THOUGHT!

Come on, Katherine, the movie wasn't THAT bad...

COMING SOON!

Wait...what?

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

We fight for Love.


The long-promised Commando podcast is finally here, and Commando is the Greatest GREATEST Movie EVER. Featuring Daryl Surat from AnimeWorldOrder, and Dave and Joel from Fast Karate for the Gentleman, this podcast clocks in at just under forty-six and a half minutes, making it the longest podcast yet. But that's only because it was nigh-impossible to curb Daryl's enthusiasm for Arnold's rippling man-muscles.

Arnold-as-Civilian...

Arnold-as-Commando...

I think I see a pattern here.

7 Minutes, 28 Seconds In:
Double-Billing!
Bill Paxton.

Bill Duke.


30 Minutes, 1 Second In:

Invoking his power as the avatar of Raoh, King of Fists, Daryl lays some nerd-slap down upon the Almighty Gooberzilla. But fear not, intrepid listeners. A later slip involving other popular eighties movies allows me to regain face.

38 Minutes, 16 Seconds In:
Why Vernon Wells deserves an Academy Award:




Ah, it's good to be alive.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Mom is Totally Fired.


Escape from LA is the Greatest Movie EVER, much to the chagrin of Dave and Joel over at Fast Karate for the Gentlemen.

2 Minutes, 4 Seconds In:

The name I was looking for here was "Lee Van Cleef".

3 Minutes, 16 Seconds In:

Cuervo Jones, the villain of this picture. He's into love and peace.

15 Minutes, 21 Seconds In:

I don't care what Mom says, Pam Grier is all woman. Even when she's technically a man.

17 Minutes, 34 Seconds In:

Mom is totally fired. But fear not, intrepid listeners, she'll certainly be back. Only at greatly reduced pay...

COMING SOON!

"I don't need no gun!"

That's right, folks. Tune in soon to hear the Almighty Gooberzilla, Daryl Surat from AnimeWorldOrder, and the aforementioned Dave and Joel from Fast Karate for the Gentlemen tackle the transcendent glory of the Greatest GREATEST Movie EVER, Commando!

Saturday, November 11, 2006

More Cronenberg!


Spider is the Greatest Movie EVER. Seriously. I'm not being facetious here. It's an awesome film.

0 Minutes, 47 Seconds In:

Ralph Fiennes as Dennis "Spider" Kleg.
It's spelled "Ralph". It's pronounced "Ray". DOES NOT COMPUTE...

3 Minutes, 16 Seconds In:

John Neville as Terrence. He's a sad puppy.

8 Minutes, 20 Seconds In:

Gabriel Byrne giving the look of death. I'm glad he's not my dad.

12 Minutes, 1 Second In:

Miranda Richardson nice...

...Miranda Richardson naughty.

16 Minutes, 11 Seconds In:

We take a cheap-shot at Christopher Lloyd.

Until next time, we out! PEACE!

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

I lied.

Due to unforeseen circumstances beyond even my Mighty control, the Highlander 2: Renegade Version Podcast is hereby postponed until further notice. A multitude of factors went into making this decision, not the least of which: a broken Netflix DVD and various computer hiccups. I also moved into my new apartment (aka "The Pimp Krib") this week, which is why this podcast is a wee bit late. I am now officially small pimpin'. One day I hope to graduate to medium pimpin', or -- dare I to dream? -- big pimpin'.

Anyway...

The Punisher (1989) is the Greatest Movie EVER.


9 Minutes, 48 Seconds In:

The Punisher loves kids.

However...


Kids do not love the Punisher.

15 Minutes In:

WTF?

CLOSING THOUGHT:

I'm not sure I'm comfortable with Tonka's newest line of remote control trucks...